Monday, October 1, 2012
Posted by Zek J. Evets at 11:08 PM
When I was 4 years old I nearly died twice.
The first happened when I was running across the street (without looking both ways) from a friend's house and was hit by a speeding car. The driver did not stop. I landed on the curb and busted my gut. I remember my mother running out from the house to me, lifting me up to make sure I was alive. Once that small fact was confirmed she then slapped me hard across the face and just cried. The next day I got a hernia operation.
The second happened when I was learning how to swim and was chucked into the deep end on the last day of the last swim class. I sank, quickly, and blacked out. I awoke to a man's lips pulling away from mine and a half circle of my classmates pointing and laughing at me. I was naked; my swim trunks had fallen off in the near-death struggle.
These things should affect me more, but they don't. Am I resistant? Or am I empty? Am I even truly human in the sense that I feel what others feel? Maybe it's just that I can't believe how lucky I am while also being so incredibly unlucky. It gives me pause. Makes me hesitant, cautious... scared. Tired.
But I have gotten very good at trudging.