Friday, September 14, 2012

Meandering Along the Corridor

Been posting a lot less lately, as you can tell (presuming there any of "you" out there to even read this) and mostly it's because this blog began as an attempt to impress a young woman who has long since disappeared from my life. Then it became an outlet for my poetry. Then my studies on anthropology, race, sexism, classism, etc. Then my political ideas. Randomly it was also a place to post cool pictures, nerdy-things, and generally just talk about whatever.

Now, it's like walking into an old apartment that I used to live in. All the furniture is gone and the walls look just too damn white. It feels strange, alien, and very very boring.

But I'm going to try not to let that stop me from mentioning a couple of things:

1. The Romney/Ryan ticket has shown itself to be built on lies and become the laughing-stock of American politics.

2. Zimmerman is well and truly an evil person. The facts of the case, as they continue to unravel during the adjudication process, show this incontrovertibly.

3. The demographic shift has come at last to the electorate. As many are noticing in the reactionary conservative wing of the country, there simply aren't enough Angry White Men to keep up the momentum of bigotry, prejudice, and discrimination which has been part & parcel of this country since The Founders determined that women shouldn't vote, Black people only counted as three-fifths of a person, and poor people can suck it.

4. My life has proceeded quite well. I've been officially promoted to advocate at my firm, in addition to my writerly duties. The job has brought a lot of my knowledge and skills into an acute conflict with the real world, particularly the sheer idiocy of so many people in power. It'd be funny if it weren't so detrimental to the struggling people we help on a daily basis.

5. On the flip side, so much of my life has changed, from my habits to my hobbies, that I hardly recognize myself in the mirror anymore. I get less time to be introspective and it's something I miss dearly. Hopefully that'll change as I gain more stability in this transitory period from college grad to career

6. I enjoy pissing people off a lot more now, especially when they're ignorant, mostly because I have the know-how to do it. Go figure.

7. Going on strong for 3 years with the girlfriend come the end of this year. So take that haters from way back when!

8. I've begun to realize how much smarter and how much stupider I am than other people. It's funny to see someone who would normally look up to, only to find out that they're just a dumbass with no fucking clue. It's also very, very sad. But at the same time, the strangest people surprise me with how much I still need to learn, particularly those who would normally never have spoken with but for the unusual fact that random people always like to chat with me.

9. People die, grow older, shit happens, and changes occur. I've lost friends, acquaintances, and even small parts of myself these past months. Simultaneously, I've seen changes in people I used to know which have brought smiles as well as frowns. Those I thought incapable have proven themselves to be more than capable. Those I thought good people have proven themselves to be ignorant. Others have changed in small ways, and we've all just seemingly changed. For better or worse, right?

10. Lastly, I'm tired. So tired. Always tired. Why? Because I'm doing so much. Every day. I haven't stopped since I hit the ground running when I graduated. I'm worried that if I slow down enough to think everything will fall apart. Or, worse, I'll realize I've been running in the wrong direction... At the same time though, I feel content in my work, my hobbies, my attempts to "keep up" with things. Guess we'll see!


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