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Thursday, September 23, 2010

Life of a Gamer


You know you're a hardcore grinder when you stay up till 5 AM leveling up your avatar and farming cheap items to sell to newbies at major spawn points for radically inflated prices before going on a raid with your guild to finally finish the last dregs of your quest-log.

Meanwhile the Hot-Pockets are stale, and the Dr. Pepper is flat. Your hair is greasy from running your crumby hands through it, and your eyes are beady reflections of the computer screen because you can see the ticker better with high res in low light. Your back is cramped but you can't notice because you haven't gotten up in six hours since you last used the restroom. The mouse-pad is imprinted with your palm, and your wrist feels the beginnings of carpal-tunnel. But you don't care because you just won a roll for an epic item and upgraded your spec.

Does any of this make sense? If so, you may very well be a gamer.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Women I Used To Know: Part Deuce

[This graphic is a joke. I do not advocate actual violence. Only metaphorical.]


When one writes about the past, the most important thing is to make sure it's really still the past.

Because if you write about something still present, it'll get ya...

People are often amazed at the stories of my life. I'll admit, some of things that have happened are almost impossible, but honestly, the kicker is that so much could happen in so short a time. I feel like I've lived enough in twenty-four years to fill at least three semi-exciting lives to the ripe old age of ninety. But that isn't gonna happen. So it goes.

Today's bloggings are firmly rooted to a younger me however, and certainly will entertain the two (or three) of you who still read these ramblings. This story is actually the start of a relationship with women that came to dominate my life for the next decade, until I met the miracle that is my girlfriend.

So let's get started!

***Author's Note: certain names, dates, and details have been changed to prevent anyone charging me with libel. Thank you.***

Thursday, September 16, 2010

FRS FTW


This article is a great take on the Hofstra false-rape case, and more importantly the need to criminalize false-rape claims in this country, as well as how rape hysteria leads to gross misconduct by the media, the police, as well as the courts of law and public opinion. It's a long article, but details exactly what's wrong on multiple levels that Feminists seem hesitant to condemn as quickly as they condemned the poor men who were exonerated.

Enjoy: [Lambs to the Slaughter]

Monday, September 13, 2010

Sad Bastard Poetry


This will be the titular piece of my next book, featuring three short stories, and twelve poems -- including this one -- alongside original pieces of graffiti by local artists. Publication date: May 2011. Hopefully.

***Author's Note: work is still in progress. This is only a third draft.***

Enjoy:

Monday, September 6, 2010

Making a Masculist Funny


I just had to repost this joke from [Listverse].

Mostly because It's so true, and damn hilarious. Enjoy:

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Pop Culture Virgin


Today I saw a twelve year-old dressed like a slutty thirty-something, complete with belt-sized denim mini-skirt, tube-top, gratuitous amounts of make-up and... an abstinence bracelet on her wrist.

It was enough to make me triple-take so hard I tweaked my neck.

She wasn't alone either. There was her Dad, and her Mom, and her little sister, and even an older brother! Such a sweet little family -- all apparently condoning her blatant tween sexuality.