Sunday, January 10, 2010

Friday Night Open-Mic Notes: 01/08/09

A week of remeeting my ex-intimates.

My new girlfriend totally called it when she said, "now that you're with someone, girls will be coming out the woodwork."

It's scary how she predicts these things. If I was just a little bit more ignorant, I might believe she was actually related to Ms. Cleo! According to the current tally, I've had close-encounters of the embarrassing-kind five times so far.

Let's make a list:

[jump to continue -- click header]

1) Ran into an ex-one-night stand at the Museum of Modern Art free day

2) Got an emotionally charged text-message from my ex-pen-pal/phone-pal saying how much she missed me

3) Was gmail-chat stalked by another ex who recently moved to the city... and wanted to hang out

4) Received an open-invitation to "reconnect" textually with an ex-flame from years ago by mailing each other letters

The proverbial topping on this ironically, way-too-coincidentally strange cake

5) Was at my ritual open-mic this Friday and who should I see on the couch reading Dave Sedaris? Another ex, and she doesn't even live here!

This has led me to dub a new urban socio-cultural phenomenon where one goes through periods of random run-ins with people you used to know in a pseudo-romantic, possibly sexual way. It also stems partially from Oscar Wilde's quote, "It's an odd thing, but anyone who disappears is said to be seen in San Francisco. It must be a delightful city and possess all the attractions of the next world.

I call this theory: The San Francisco Effect.

The basic assumption is that the most awkward moments occur between two people who used to have sex. (Or something like that.)

But lucky for me, my girlfriend is real chill about these sorts of silly things that happen to me on a daily basis. (It's all part of my awkwardly-hilariously-awesome package.) She gave me some advice, a couple of chuckles, and a healthy dose of teasing before leaving me here to deal with all this... random.

Le sigh. C'est la vie. Asi que va. Keep on keeping on. Blah blah blah. There's something wrong with my magnetic field if it attracts this much personal-insanity.


Other observations from the night:

-- Macbook musicians
-- check-out "Beautiful Agony"
-- it is a physical impossibility to kick yourself in the nuts
-- young girls who look like old girls dressed like young girls made-up like older girls stripped down like younger girls who all might be between the ages of 18 & 30

4 footnotes:

Jasmin said...

I didn't want to be the first to comment (I'm guessing most of your readers are still sleeping), but you know I have an opinion on everything/everyone and I couldn't hold it any longer. :-)

Can I start with a great big "I told you so?" (I'm totally breaking my NYR, but just for a minute or so.) Number 5 was the only other live encounter--how did it compare to number 1 (which was hilarious if I haven't already said so)?

You've just inspired me to write a post about my theory, the "now that you're with someone, girls will be coming out the woodwork" part. This will be fun. :-)

PS. Told ya so!

Zek J Evets said...

@jasmin: haha, yes... you told me so. but let's be classy and stop telling me you told me so, huh? ; )

number 5 to number 1 was way less awkward. mostly because my girlfriend wasn't there, haha! but also because we said hi and left it at that.

can't wait to read the newly inspired post based on my life-story! =P

Jasmin said...

You mean gloating isn't classy? A part of me just shriveled up and died. :-P

So running into exes is less awkward when your girlfriend isn't there? Imagine that. ;-)

in between thoughts said...

life just has a funny way... it's really weird how people have a tendency to pop back in your life when everything's going pretty dandy. bleh! p.s. your girlfriend sounds cute!