Monday, November 30, 2009

Masculism: An Introduction

Besides racial issues, I also find myself involved in intense discussions regarding gender dynamics, particularly as they apply to our current cultural values. Often these debates quickly devolve into accusations of bigotry (much the same as with racial issues) that don't really accomplish much other than solidifying the opinions of the other person in opposition.

However, at the risk of being perceived as a chauvinist-pig, I would like to introduce many of you to a movement that isn't as well known as it's female counterpart, Feminism. This movement is concerned with the advocacy of men's rights and the promotion of male equality in the context of changing gender roles. This movement is little known outside of the blogosphere and esoteric academia. It is - I think - an important concern in these modern times.

That is, Masculism.

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Saturday, November 28, 2009

The Writer as Character

Frequently when writing of/about/from personal experience, people tend to assume that they are the subjects of my stories. They find coincidence and naturally assume it must be directed at them. There seems to be a unique kind of arrogance in a person who can read the words of another and think, "Is he talking about me?"

Let me elucidate the unique characteristics of most writers.

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Monday, November 23, 2009

New Works In Progress

Ever since the publication of my book, I've been somewhat lazy about doing any serious poetical work. But I'm making up for that by writing way better poems than I used to. (Not that the ones in my book aren't amazing also, mind you.)

This is a new piece that I'm adding to my ever-growing collection of "Love Poems."

(I'm starting to turn into Lord Byron, E.E. Cummings, or Stephen Dunn.)


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Friday, November 20, 2009


Is when your inner-critic tells you that something needs to be edited.

If you look around (carefully look around) you'll notice there's something missing from my blog...

A whole mess of posts.

That's because I have quietly been going around and removing every one that mentions too much about my personal-life - my dating history, women I've known, friends I've had, anecdotes, happysad moments, and other things of a sensitive, personal nature. I reread, copied, pasted, saved every entry to my eJournal. Then I deleted them from my blog.


Because I have finally realized that maybe this catharsis via full-disclosure isn't a good thing.

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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Muni Acoustics

The Humble Request of a Poorly Mannered Municipal Transportation Participant to the General Public.


Sunday, November 15, 2009

Recommendations Via Past-Tense

 I found this as a comment while browsing through the bowels of my blog. (There's a lot of interesting stuff in there, actually.) It was such a good piece that I thought I'd share it with all of you. It's a Stephen Dunn poem. He is a great writer, definitely worth checking out.

Anyways, hope ya'll enjoy it!

Courtesy to my good friend M. Tansy Gibbles for sending it to me.

"Each From Different Heights
by S.D.

That time I thought I was in love
and calmly said so
was not so much different from the time
I was truly in love
and slept poorly and spoke out loud
to the wall
and discovered the hidden genius
of my hands.
And the times I felt less in love,
less than someone,
were, to be honest, not so different
Each was ridiculous in its own way
and each was tender, yes,
sometimes even the false is tender.
I am astounded
by the various kisses we're capable of.
Each from different heights
diminished, which is simply the law.
And the big bruise
from the longer fall looked perfectly white
in a few years.
That astounded me most of all."

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Sexploitational Depravity

In Saboteur Academica's quest to bring you the latest - and greatest - in Alternative Knowledge, we have prepared a list of Sexually Exploitative Acts that will have you rolling on the floor laughing. (Also known as ROFL, roflcopter, roflobster, roflmao, roflmaobbqkthx and other 1337 abbreviations.) These examples of depraved sexploitation have been culled from the bowels of chauvinistic glory and internet misogyny.

You've heard of the Kama Sutra? Well, this is the Smuta Sutra.



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Monday, November 9, 2009


I have a new fetish for frankenwords, fusionwords, words made by the combination of two other wordlings into something both and yet, different. It's quite lovely to compound language into layers of layers that taste like an especially good cake in your mouth when you say them. Maybe it's just the writer in me, or maybe it's just the wit, the joy of punning. Something like that. Either way, I like 'em, and here's more of 'em.

- Sarcastic + Caustic = Sarcaustic

- Human + Animal = Humanimal

- Pessimist + Optimist = Pessoptimist

- Blacks + Exploitation = Blaxploitation

- Zebra + Donkey = Zedonk

- Bro + Hipster = Broster

- Friend + Enemy = Frenemy

- Academic + Amateur = Acateur

- Slang + Language = Slanguage

- Holidays + Daze = Holidaze

- Video + Idiots = Videots

- Sex + Texting = Sexting

- Ambidextrous + Sex = Ambisextrous

- California - Fornication = Californication

- Inbred + Redneck = Inbredneck

- Happiness + Mess = Happimess

- Information + Apocalypse = Infocalypse

- Surreal + Reality = Surreality

- Melancholy + Alcoholic  = Melancholic

Those are all the ones I can think of for now. Feel free to submit your own.


Sunday, November 8, 2009

More Important Things To Do

I don't appreciate my education.

But the rhythms of my life are measured by it.

School schedules are the boundaries of work schedules, semesters are the silhouettes to vacations, and the perimeter of my life is the college campus.

I am partially defined by my student-status. Who I am is an amateur academic; an acateur.

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Saturday, November 7, 2009

Naming Musical Instruments

Something interesting that happened while I was giving my music student his lesson today. He pulled out his saxophone and said, "alright Judy, time for exercises."

Is isn't just me; everyone names their instruments!

Famous musicians do it all the time, but rarely do I hear about regular people naming theirs. A friend of mine named his drums, and I know my old bandmates named theirs on occasion. (Though they changed the names every so often, which was kinda funny. "This is Shannon." "Wasn't it Mary before?" "No, I think it was Gloria... or maybe Margaret. Whatever. It doesn't matter." "Okay.")

The point is, in all my years as a musician, nobody has ever really talked about this random little thing.

Some famous examples of named musical instruments:

1. Lucille, the name given by B.B. King to every single one of his guitars
2. Blue & Floyd, the names Billie Joe from Greenday gave to some of his guitars
3. Trigger, the name of Willie Nelson's guitar
4. Dolphin, a rare Stradivarius violin, originally by George Hart who named it
5. Davidov, another Stradivarius instrument, a cello, currently owned by Yo-Yo Ma

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Wednesday, November 4, 2009


Just finished watching this movie on Netflix. The film was a recommendation. It confirms my obsession with Audrey Tautou.

Seriously, is there anyone on the planet who doesn't want to bone this lil' French honey-dripper? She's got more cuteness in one eyelash than all the college co-eds at Arizona State put together. Her performance in the movie was not just AMAZING, but it was also FUCKING SPECTACULAR. She was so wonderfully feminine - vulnerable but beautiful - playing all the guys, yet fooling only herself in the end as Love turns her practiced existence upsidedown.

Yes, I love me some Audrey. In fact, I'd like to take the time to tanget here and speak to Miss Tautou personally:

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Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Authorial Spotlight

Favorite poet of all time?

E.E. Cummings.


Because - unlike the bigguns of Yeats, or Eliot, or Ginsberg, those cheap, paper-back, dimestore fairies - Cummings writes like a true poet. He writes about love and loving, about life and living. He writes so uniquely that you'll never mistake his work for another's. He plays with grammar and structure and font and display on the page. Unfortunately, he is also relatively obscure. Nobody teaches him all that much. Nobody in my entire college career has devoted half the time to Double-E Cummings as they have to boring foghorns like Keats or Longfellow or Robert Fucking Frost.

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