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Thursday, May 15, 2008

Lovely lovers didn't love love lovingly

Welcome back to the next installment of my multi-blog on Love.

When last we left your hero, I was just getting into the comfortability of Love - at least, idea-wise.

Is that all there is then? Just a small comforting feeling that tells me one day, when I least expect it, "I'm in love!"? It seems so, especially nowadays. But back in the time before nowadays it was a little more complicated.


Does this scene look familiar to you? Maybe I should add in some more contemporary clothing... but on the whole, it's a rather striking representation of nearly everyone in my generation getting their shits and giggles on.

I know! Guy like me: handsome, intelligent, romantic - celebate?

Apparently so. I don't really get how people can just go out and have such casual sex with each other. Maybe I get too attached...or maybe I'm so desperate that I get attached because I'm afraid to lose any chance I get.

Am I just a different male brand? Unable to go out and do it like they do on the Discovery Channel? An analog genre in the digital world? What's the reason for this stretch of un-sex? I wanna know, because, frankly, my hand's getting tired.

Either way, at the end of the night I always end up alone.

And it's not like I'm not trying! I've had enough close encounters of the sexual kind to give me blue-balls for life. Something always comes up; I miss a signal, another guy cuts me off, she's on her period (really happened), or some other cosmic coincidence comes along and fucks the whole possiblity to shite.

What does this have to do with Love? Everything. Why? Because lots of people equate sex with love (though, they're not actually the same.) Nonetheless, sex plays a key role in Love because without physical intimacy it's really hard to keep a...relationship-like thing...going. You need to be close...to be close. At least, that's what I think.

So, everyone's having a buncha sex. Just sex, sex, sex, sex, sex! But I'm a die-hard romantic.

I pretend to be as fucking shallow as the next broster; but in the end, give me a half-eaten box of chocolates, some Iron&Wine music, maybe a daring pair of black lace panties, and you have me at hello. Sex without intimacy, without emotion, is just not possible for me.

Here's where we get back to Love. So: boy meets girl, they talk, girl likes boy, boy already liked girl, both want to have some fun. They do. Then boy starts talking about a relationship and girl dumps him for someone less intense while boy drowns his sorrows with Stella-Artois. (Note: this is NOT based off my personal life...I swear!)
That's pretty much the happenstance whenever I try to get into something "real" with a woman.

Meanwhile, seeing everyone out there, acting so damned casual, makes me worried. Unfortunately, I'm naturally the jealous type (I usually try and keep it pretty low-key though) and with good reason! Nice guys like me tend to get fucked-up in this environment - have been for decades, centuries even.

You ladies can pretend all you want, but you know in the end it's true. You're just as horrible as us...and sometimes even worse.

I don't go into anything expecting to be cheated on. Most of the time I just try to pretend that the sexual history of the women I meet isn't as slutty as it sometimes sounds. But, it still made me wonder, and worry.

Every Good Guy's Worst Fear:

This comic is the EPITOME of my paranoia - and damn if I haven't seen it happen to other guys like me a dozen times or more.

So yeah, it's hard to have love in this kind of atmosphere. I'm fucking scared to put myself out there like that amongst all these shallow people just looking for a one night stand, if even that.

Where's a guy gonna find real love, then? Stay-tuned for the next installment to find out more!

Love! A Lamester's Story.

4 footnotes:

mary said...

It happens to girls too :(

Alexandra said...

It does happen to girls too. But that epic love you're looking for...everyone is in too much of a rush to cultivate that. Seriously, when is the last time you met a person who took their time to build up a relationship brick by brick, and didn't bullshit about anything?

varmintspath said...

its guys like you that keep me from being jealous of the single guys who seem to be having all the fun. i had my first real girlfriend at fifteen and now i'm thirty five and yes still with that girl we lost our virginity together awww. so my experience with women is how should i say uh limited. but this relationship has really been stretched you see i'm the nice guy, the lets talk guy, the affectionate guy, the sensitive guy, and she was the bitch girl, the hurt your feelings and never say sorry girl, and on and on so i'm thinking i need to get out of here soil my oats see whats out there the single life, mad sex no commitments. problem i get attached too easily therefore my girl promised to do better and i will take my chances with her because frankly it sounds to me single life sucks for nice guys like us uh sorry man. unless she starts being a bitch again in which case i might actually ask if me and you could meet up and maybe you can tell me where to start...maybe...to be continued...

varmintspath said...

oh and these girls are funny saying it happens to girls too...hello it mostly happens to girls...we nice guys are a rare species...to be continued...